FANCY MEETING YOU HERE

Love Is Only A Feeling
By The Darkness
Best Video Codes

Patrick managed to upload some pictures he had e.mailed to him. We often chat on instant messenger, it makes me smile as nine times out of ten he has been surrounded by the local children who apparently crowd round him in the internet cafe's and just stare as Patrick put it,much like his time spent in Iraq at times surrounded by the natural innocent curiousity of children though very different circumstances. I know Patrick enjoys these moments by the way he tells his stories... the warmth and laughter that comes from observing and interacting with them.

The people by his reports have made his stay memorable and made the many long bus journeys more bearable, one in particular was full of brazillians who had just won a big match over there that Patrick had gone and watched, delighted by the atmosphere.

The pictures include the bassist Frankie from the group the darkness , his brother owned the lodges where Patrick first stayed. The group has now split up, due apparently to bad sales of the last album and unfortunately, drug and mental health problems.

Im wondering where the location was for the shoot on this video, the scenery is astounding, it would be phenomenal to watch the sunrise and set in a place like this I should imagine. The other group photo was taken after a game of football on the beach.

Another is a picture of the Wamori indian village that they stayed in for a few days after cannoing up the Orinnoco. The birds remind me of flamenco's though Im not sure if that is what they are, but would I love to see these with my own eyes in flight int their natural habitat.

Its good to see Patrick look so fit, healthy and relaxed. I know from our conversations he has made many friends and exchanged many e.mail addresses on this trip, I also got the opportunity to speak on the telephone to Nicole who Patrick described as 'awesome', a local girl who took Patrick under her wing for a couple of days in St Elena, the conversation was brief but sweet non the less.

He arrives back in the UK, so much more he will have wanted to see, but a night out with his sisters in London awaits him and return to work the following week. He is unsure as to whether he will go to Norway for his winter training or be sent to Afghanistan, whichever he will have many wonderful memories to dip into now and again.

Keeping track

Patrick has been in touch a few times since his departure, at the moment he is on a 3 day ferry trip down the Amazon to a place called Belem. I have to admit Im a bit confused as I had thought he had already made it to there given he has undertaken an 18 hour bus trip and then an 11 hour bus trip a few days later. I havent been able to find a map that shows the smaller towns. The last place he was in was a small town called Manaus and prior to that a place called St Elena

I have managed however to find pictures of the places he will visit, below...Belem




From Belem to Recife

Apparently they call this the Venice of Brazil, I would love to see this for myself,its beautiful




Then onto Salvador-de-bahia



He really is enjoying every minute of his travel and would of course love to have more time as he feels there is so much more he would love to see. He is speaking of returning to Caracas with a view to buying a property and doing the tours himself.

I was surprised when he said he has just over a year to complete his four years initial sign up for the Marines and is giving serious consideration to doing this in the future. If he stays for over five years he will qualify for a bonus and feels this will give him enough time to consider the possibilities and build the contacts he would need

The owner of lodges where he initially stayed was a young scottish guy who took the plunge when he fell in love with the country and he and Patrick have exchanged e.mails and intend to keep in touch. Whatever his future plans Im sure Patrick needed this trip to put some distance between his experience of serving in trouble torn Iraq.

My thoughts and prayers are with the men out there now and with their families at home who live with the daily anxiety, longing for them to come home safely.

Looking forward

My life has reached a very definite crossroads I feel, a time of gathering and examination to see whats in this package called Audrey.

Apart from the trip to Africa, for a long time now Ive felt a dissatisfaction with my work, I think this maybe a result of the recovery based courses Ive attended, they have always left me feeling there is so much more we could be offering the people we support and much of the work I find myself doing today is so bogged down with paperwork and red tape that it makes me want to scream.

I see the expressions on the faces of the people I support as I approach them with yet another peice of paper, another policy, another form to sign that has really nothing to do with supporting and enabling them to discover or experiment with ways of using the skills and talents they possess to enhance their quality of life. In fact the particular service I work in at the moment is so bogged down with problems within the team and the dynamics of the team that its come to feel that its all about us and not the people we are paid to support.

Our organisation is charity based and undergoing changes within its structure in order to save money. Changes have already been made to upper management and our area manager is now based down in Glasgow, locality managers and service managers are next in line for the big heave ho!! The organisations aim for 2008 is apparently to make a five million pound profit!!! doh!!!! Whilst I love working with the people who need support this organisation no longer feels right for me, its values and ethics just dont fit and sit easy with me anymore.

A new diploma course I had first heard about during the last recovery conference I attended has been approved and is set to run at a university about an hours drive away from where I live..Im soooooooooooo tempted, but wonder if the diploma will be recognised by health boards and other agencies as recovery as a working model is so new. The other option Im considering is returning nursing and doing a degree in that which could possibily take less time as I had passed a two year nursing course way back in the days when bell bottoms and afro hair do's were all the rage.

But first things first, the trip, a little time to think things through, who knows I may discover some hidden, dormant talent or skill whilst Im out in the bush...Lion tamer, rodeo girl, zulu warrior, whatever as Mama Cass Elliot says I need to make my own kinda music, sing my own special song, whatever that may be???

BANKS,VULTURES AND HYENAS..SPOT THE DIFFERENCE

I must admit I found myself rumminating last night over the situation with the bank..Thinking back to my circumstances all those years ago and the decisions I made then.

Would I make the same decision today I asked myself, the conclusion was a resounding YES!!!

At the time my focus was on feeding my kids and finding a proper and decent home for them, as due to their fathers actions they found themselves with me in what can only be described as a chicken shack...good enough for me on my own, but totally inadequate for my kids and heartbreaking given the home they had left behind which was less than two minutes away from the dump they were now living in.


I'd never been in debt before so it was a horrendous feeling and knowing there was absolutely no way I could pay anything back to the bank, I chose to ignore them until my situation had changed for the better and what I saw as my priorities were met, not a good idea perhaps and not something I would recommend, but given their ruthlessness now,I cant help but wonder just how symapathic they would have been in reality..KIDS FIRST,FACELESS INSTITUTIONS can wait as I knew they would survive unscathed

I knew then that my decision would have repercussions in the future and was willing to accept this and have, but today I can say those repercussions are not the end of the world.

All past now but boy!!! am I angry with their refusal to leave the account operational for another week. Their profuse apology and acceptance that its their fault I was given the account in the first place is meaningless, they have their money,paid back in full some time ago,I pose no risk to them by having this months salary paid in and transferred, so RBS take protective counter shields down and find your heart.

Now this all over and looking to the future, the post title will perhaps make some sense.

I hope Im not breaking any bloggette ettiquette here but I am making an executive decision here to link to a post that cheered me up no end this morning,had me in stiches and truly inspired me.....Forgive me Dan but this is so must read, gauranteed to brighten your day..

http://dabalogh.blogspot.com/2007/02/germans-and-hyenas.html


Dont worry be happy,even in the face of vultures and hyenas :)(if possible)

***Text message from Patrick in Caracas***

'Alrite mam everythin is fine,place is awesome but a hard city. i already got a girls number in a resturant!'

LOL...Priorities of the young at heart, glad he has a friend already

From here to ??

Coming soon to a screen near you (PERHAPS)




My original blog I set up at blog.com this will soon join the many, many seemingly abandoned blogs on that site, and here I am.

I first started blogging as a way of staying focussed on a special dream I have of travelling to Africa, initially South Africa on a horse safari near the foot of the Drakensburgh mountains. I hope to have the finances to enable me to live this dream next year, in the meantime, Im keeping it alive through this blog, as it can be so easy to loose sight of dreams through circumstances and situations that crop up and take over..yet time and time again I have found myself writing as a mother, writing about my childrens travel.

This has been educational, inspiring and unexpected for me too, I delight in the knowledge that they have created and seized the opportunities open to them to travel and I have had the opportunity to share to an extent their experiences through their stories.

Patrick my youngest son will land in Venuezuala tonight to begin his 7 weeks of travel, he seems so young at 20, yet having served two tours of duty in Iraq I have to do a reality check on my natural mothering instincts and acknowledge HIS life experience at such a young age, and delight that he is living life his way.

We sat for a couple of days before he went, chatting, as he made his map and route, scouring the internet for the places and sites he definitely wants to see during his stay and finding out the information about where to go and where not to go, what to watch out for and be careful about.

He travelled to London on Monday to stay with his sister Laura before jetting off. Laura has been fortunate enough to travel through her work with a film production company and has just recently returned from the Cannes film festival.

She called to say that Patrick had arrived safely, then all excited tells me that she had applied for one of those reality television shows, Shipwrecked.
Not expecting to hear anything from them, she then goes on to say that she has made it through to the second round and has been called for an interview for the next stage...Where does it all end.....Where did it all begin??

Ive not seen this show and I have to say that Im not a fan this genre of show, its all too much Desmond Morris'y and watching the chimps at the zoo for my liking, but that just me, I know they make for popular viewing for some reason.

The thought of seeing my own daughter appear in one is too much for me to comprehend at the moment. Part of me wants her to succeed if thats what she wants, but another part of me is saying...OH GOD NO!!! but I dont honestly know why...

Im laughing at myself in the meantime and looking forward to the days when I AM sleeping under the stars or galloping across the plains in Africa...No cameras please...Im a celebrity..get me outta here.

Angel Falls Venezuela

Today I had reason to turn the tables on myself. I tried to imagine how my children will feel when I take off on my travel to Africa. Ive always been there, just a call away, they have always known how to reach me, where to reach me, and if I felt it necessary and urgent I would drop things to be there and present for them. Thats how its meant to be, sometimes not easy but at the end of the day, that simple.

Patrick leaves on Wednesday, I feel a mixture of pride, pleasure and shared excitement for him. He, as he said he would, is travelling opting for Venuezela, Caracas and backpacking down to Brazil.

S**t , that was the first thought that entered my head,I asked if he didnt fancy a month just relaxing on a beach in Spain, but having already explored a few options with him, I knew this was of no interest to him. His choices were limited due to not being able to acquire necessary Visa's for his first choices at the last minute. So hes off, not really prepared I feel, or am I just a mother...lol

I perhaps shouldnt have shown him my travel brochures from i to i who arrange overseas placements nor told him about STA travel who arrange student travel, but I did and now Im nagging or at least thats how it feels..Have you got this, have you got that, promise you will keep contact every couple of days etc etc etc.

I think my main issue or concern is that he is travelling alone, but Im sure he will be fine..

There now Ive got that off my chest I can shut up, it has however made me realise the importance of little things, informed risk taking, the importance of preparation and keeping contact with those sitting at home wondering if you are ok, I may just slip a few little reminders in his Calvin Kleins ***RING YOUR MOTHER*** CALL HOME OR ELSE!!! any suggestions welcome..
Patrick wants to see Angel falls which is apparently the highest waterfall in the world, and having found it on Youtube I can fully understand why, its absolutely astounding, now I wish I were going with him